“So God created man in His own image;
He created him in the image of God;
He created them male and female.”
– Genesis 1:27
And boy did he create the differently. Ever heard of the book Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus? I personally have never read the book, but I can relate to the feeling that men seem to be from a different planet. (And I am sure there are probably at least a few men who feel the same about women.)
One of my favorite things about reading and writing romantic fiction is the perspective of the story from both sexes. Reading it is easy. Writing it? Not so much.
In fact, in my first draft of my work in progress, my critique partners gently revealed to me that my hero was a whiny, wimpy, girly-man (my words, not theirs). I may be married to a man, but I certainly couldn’t write or think like a man. Boy, was I thankful to discover that early into my writing!
So I set my manuscript aside and decided to dive into the world of male point of view. I looked at suggested articles and sought more out on my own. What I discovered, from both the male and female writers of these articles, was a pattern.
Men are pretty straightforward creatures with specific tendencies in their speech, inner thoughts, and behavior.
Over the next couple weeks, I will give a bulleted list of what I have learned. Keep in mind that these bullets are just patterns that I found. There are always exceptions.
- They rarely end sentences with questions or say things like “I’m not sure.”
- They do not use expressive adjectives (wonderful, gorgeous, etc. unless being sarcastic). Usually, “it’s okay” or “it looks good” are about what you get.
- They are rarely heard saying “May I? Could I? Should I?”
- They rarely use words like darling, honey, or sweetheart except during times of intimacy or moment of extreme stress.
- Make dialogue to the point.
- Conversations are a means to relay information not build relationships.
- Conversations are typically on a non-important topic until everything dies away
- Guy conversations generally involve the least amount of words possible.
- Generally, guys only have two or three things in common with other – sports, work, music, games, food. Gossip is off the table.
- If two guys disagree on something, expect some flaring tensions and arguments.
- Talking with girls varies. Some are very shy, some of full of confidence and swagger. Some try to be amicable and get a laugh out of you whether you’re guy or a girl.
- If men are embarrassed they usually try to laugh it off.
- If men are hurt they get quiet and try not to get mad.
- Prefer direct action to talk.
- Are problem solvers. They rarely listen without giving advice.
- Rarely ask for advice.
- Rarely admit to being wrong and their apologies tend to be gruff and unpolished.
- Rarely respond to a direct command unless they are outranked.
- Say what they think. They don’t use euphemisms.
- Use very black-and-white talk – it is what it is; a spade is a spade.
- Don’t do small talk.
- Rarely punctuate speakers with agreeing noises.
- Mostly repress emotions except anger.
- Are a lot less likely to share their feelings. Feelings are private, which are none of your business.
What do you think? Is anything off base? Is there anything you would add? Share it in the comments below and then come back next week when I tackle male thought patterns and behaviors.